Gold, myrrh and

(Noah singing Christmas carols at the mall - and no, the bow is not in his hair, it's in the hair of the little girl behind him!)


"Mama, what was it the Wise Men brought to Baby Jesus? Oh, yeah. Gold, myrrh and horrendous." - Noah

Today, I am thankful for......

The crazy things my children do.

For example, Noah came home yesterday an upon arrival made a quick trip to the bathroom. Within moments he came running out, on the verge of hysteria. "Today was the worst day ever!" He wailed. Nervously, I asked him why. "Because," he lamented, "I wore my pants backwards all day long and didn't even notice!"

And yes, ladies and gentlemen, they were blue jeans!

I am also thankful for Ibuprofen. Yep. I am thankful for drugs. Somehow I've managed to aggravate an old back injury and I have been unable to get comfortable - night or day. And while the ibuprofen doesn't make the pain go away entirely, it does alleviate the pain. This makes me very thankful since the doctor can't see me until Thursday.

The Mighty Hunter has Returned

Well, my amazing husband returned on Sunday from his 10 day hunting trip to New Mexico. He shot this beautiful 330 class elk with his bow, and we are all so proud! I realized while he was gone how thankful I am to have my best friend for my husband - and how hard it is when he is gone and bad things happen!!! It's always easier to deal with things when he is with me! I also realized that I REALLY want my friend Tracy and her husband to take the elk that is currently on the wall in my house (her husband and mine shot the elk together and have joint custody of the wall mount) because I DO NOT want 2 elk on my wall. But, if we do have to have 2 I am drawing the line there. We will NOT have a third.

Meanwhile, we had Noah's parent teacher conference yesterday. We were told that he is getting better at his behavior skills (being organized, listening, participating, not talking when the teacher is talking, etc.). Okay, so he's not so good at the organization thing, but we are working on it. He also can't count to 10 (he counted to 100 while I was cooking dinner) and doesn't recognize most of his letters (he read me a flier yesterday evening and identified almost all of the letters.). He is very charming and charismatic, though, and makes his friends and teacher laugh. She loves him and said that he is a joy to have in class. She also said that he quite frequently believes that there are many other things in life that are much more important (or more fun) than what he is supposed to be doing at that moment. Lovely.

Oh, and thankfully, he hasn't drawn any more naked pictures.

My children are gifted

I have always known that my children are gifted. I mean, just way above average in every sense of the word. The other day my children saw a portrait or commercial or something portraying the statue of David. In typical child fashion, they asked me why he was naked. I explained to them that Heavenly Father created our bodies, and so they are beautiful. Some people feel like they are so beautiful that they create art to express that beauty, even though we are modest and don't think it's proper to show people our bodies so we wear clothes (trust me, this is important to reiterate!). In response, Noah went to school yesterday and drew a portrait of his brother.

In the nude.

Told ya my kids were gifted.

On Monday he drew a picture of him walking Emmaline, and he included the poop.

Picasso, here we come!

Pocket Knife

The other day, my husband gifted our youngest child with a small pocket knife, all for his very own. Shuddering, I questioned the reasoning behind this, but since I grew up with all girls - and Nathanael has had his pocket knife since he was that age - I let it go.

The next morning at breakfast Noah showed me several cuts that he had on his fingers and arm. They looked like little paper cuts and a legitimate "fall down and hurt your arm" kinda cuts, so I didn't make the connection until Carlye said, "Those are ALL from his pocket knife - and look! He tried to stab me in the stomach!"

Thankfully, as it was very small, and un-dangerous (as far as knives go), it didn't even leave a mark. Sadly, though, the pocket knife has been confiscated.

"Ya, Noah, you shouldn't even get that back until after a few birthdays!" his responsible and perfect older brother lovingly chimed in. "I would NEVER do anything like that!"

Aren't siblings wonderful?

A parked Sea Doo is a dangerous thing

Let me preface this by saying that ALL of my children are wonderful and amazing. However, Carlye and Nathanael tend to not have as many adventures as Noah, and so aren't mentioned as frequently. Thank heavens! I can only handle one Noah at a time!!

On Saturday Uncle Bubba had been tubing with our Sea Doo, and afterwards stopped by our house to put our tube back in our boat. He had the Sea Doo on a trailer attached to the back of his truck, and was parked at the bottom of our driveway. While Bubba was unloading things from the truck bed, Noah and Nathanael were riding bikes. Carl warned them not to run into the Sea Doo, but allowed them to continue riding. Almost immediately after the warning Noah hopped on his bike at the top of our driveway, and sped at a fantastic speed down the driveway.

Straight for the Sea Doo.

While I did not witness the actual catastrophe, I did find out from Daddy and Uncle Bubba that our little adventurer gained a speed of about 10 miles an hour before smashing right into the middle of the Sea Doo. His helmeted head smacked the Sea Doo right above his eyes, and right below the helmet, and his bicycle - and leg - wedged themselves under the Sea Doo. He actually dented a bolt and bent it up! Amazingly, he escaped with only a few bruises. It took Carl a good 5 minutes to ascertain whether a trip to the emergency room would be necessary. He STILL can't believe that nothing was broken.

Uncle Bubba said that it was the best imitation of a crash test dummy that he's ever seen an actual person do.

He's still not laughing.

Sadly, Noah thinks it's one of the best things that's ever happened to him.

Clean up on Aisle 12

Yesterday, Carl took our boys to Wal-Mart to pick up a gift for their friends birthday party. While they were perusing the Hunting and Fishing gear, Carl was continuously telling our youngest son to stop touching things. This may sound normal to most parents, but Noah has an unexplained desire to touch, push, open and try out EVERYTHING he passes, so trying to keep Noah's hands in his pockets is a full time job.

A few moments later Carl and Nathanael hear a loud spraying sound. Startled, they both look towards Noah. Finding it too difficult to resist the urge, Noah had pushed the button on a can of OFF. And the sprayer was pointed directly towards Noah's face! Laughing hysterically, Carl and Nathanael run over to him, while Noah tries frantically to cover his face with his hands. As Carl begins to inspect his face and eyes, Noah says "Good thing my eyelids are so fast, 'cause they closed afore that stuff could get in 'em! But my face does kinda burn."

Waitress

The other day we took the kids swimming at Carl's mom's house. While they swam with daddy, I made grilled cheese and tomato soup. I served it up, and brought it out for the kids to eat poolside. As I placed their food on the table Noah looked at me and said, "Hey, that's not what I ordered!"

Two days later

Last night, Noah came into our room a little after midnight. Since he is prone to sleep walking Carl cuddled him and took him back to bed. About 30 minutes later, Nathanael came in and said that Noah was crying. It took me a second to completely wake up and get in there, and I found my oldest son lying next to my youngest, cuddling him and helping him go back to sleep. I could have taken a picture, and boy was I proud. Nathanael went back up into his bed, and I curled up next to Noah, cuddling him close. He snuggled down and went to sleep, but couldn't seem to be still. A little while later he picked his head straight up, looked at me and said,
"Mommy, my tummy hurts."

"Try to go to sleep and you'll feel better." I told him.

A few seconds later he sat straight up in his bed, and said, "Mommy, I....."

BLEEEEH!

He threw up all over me. Yep. Barely missed my face. Which is a good thing, because then I would have thrown up, too.

He then proceeded to vomit twice more, while crying, "I've never thrown up before!"

I woke up Nathanael and asked him to please go and get his daddy. I was going to need some help.



Two days at school, only two days, and my son has already come home with the stomach bug.

Yippee.

First Day of School

First day of school

Well, yesterday was the first day of school.

And I survived.

There was a minimal amount of crying, but it ended quickly. Of course, there were a few random episodes during the day as well, but those, too, passed. Don't worry about me, though. I really will be okay. I have to be. Carl told me that I was scaring him and he had no idea what to do because he thought that all of our kids going to school was a good thing, so would I please stop?

On the way to school yesterday Carlye and Nathanael took it upon themselves to tell Noah all they could about kindergarten.

"You're going to hunt for a gingerbread man who hides all over the school. He'll leave clues here and there, and when you finally find him he leaves you gingerbread cookies to eat!" they told him.

"Huh." Noah said, "Well, when I find him, I'm gonna shoot him."

I have a very odd feeling that his teacher, the principal and I may know each other really well before the school year is over.



Second day of school

This morning, for the second day of school, my youngest informed me that he didn't need me to walk him to his class, so I agreed to drop him off at the door.

"What!?!?!" wailed my oldest, "I want you to walk me to my class!!"

"Me, too!" cried my middle child.

So that is how it came to pass that I walked my two oldest children into the school, and not my youngest.